watching

Sunday, February 04, 2007

If only...

Dreamt of him that day. I swear I was trying my very best not to think of him anymore. Have no idea why he popped up in my dream too. Made me really upset, because I was, in reality, doing very well in not thinking about him, And now! This dream! My gosh! So sad.. really didn’t help in my "moving on". Wonder what determines the contents of our dreams..

Anyway, went for a hair-cut that other day, in hope of getting a nice, interesting hair-cut, I went to this hair-salon opened by this Japanese, Shunji Matsuo. (Icon by Shunji Matsuo, located in Wisma Isetan) And guess what! $40 and about an hour later, I ended up with the same hair-style as b4, perhaps just thinner and abit more layered.. -.-'''

What happened?! Straight after the hair-cut, the hairdresser did some styling on my hair, and I looked great! Jappy, indeed! But, the next day, after I washed my hair, it's back to my old hair-style.. Sad! I had high expectations of this hair-cut because I have seen guys with nerdy hair-styles going into this salon and coming out with super stylo, jappy look. Guess it's partly my fault for not wanting a very drastic change in hair-style and wanting to stick with my curls.

But I still highly recommand this salon to all guys out there who wants to look a bit more stylo. Da hair makes da man! Remember-- with the right clothes and hair-style, any guy can look good.. ^^ the same goes for girls too, of course! U gonna dress well, that's why I'm always telling my mum that when I buy clothes, it's not wasting money, it's investment.. ^^v

Have something interesting to share-- the other day, I read in the Readers' Digest (feb 07) an article, in which, scientists claimed that there are 12 SCIENTIFICALLY proven ways to increase one's chances of getting the perfect partner.
One of the methods stated is to 'declare your desire'. According to one psychologist, if u allow someone to know that u fancy him/her, it will make him/her feels good, which, in turn will overflow into good feelings about u. Hmm.. Well.. That certainly did NOT happen in my case. So, i guess, depending on situations, science can sometimes be wrong too.

Actually, thinking about this, I thought it would have been better if only I had not declared my 'desire' for him. Perhaps, we would now still be like in the past, going out for movies, dinner and not like now, he doesn’t even want to talk to me anymore.. =(
Oh well.. if only... if only I had bought those numbers for TOTO, I would have become a millionaire now... if only I had done this, if only I had not done that… so many 'if only's.. so many unexpected regrets in life...

But, u know? Scientists sure like to contradicate each others' findings-- one minute, one grp of them will say that consuming soya beans is good for health, the next minute another grp will come along and claims that eating soya beans is not good for everyone! The same goes for omega-3, it is now said by some scientists that people with heart problems should not consume omega-3 at all.. Aiyo!

Going to end here, i'm just writing whatever random thoughts that came to my mind, so my entry is in mess, a little here, a little there. >.< I think I'd chosen a wrong time to write an entry. Working thru the night can have weird effects on your brain. I had wanted to add in some photos to try to salvage this entry, but i'm too tired for that now, seriously..

And i do need my beauty sleep, because according to that same article in the Readers' Digest-- ignore everything your mum says about inner beauty, Beautiful people are, more often than not, viewed as smarter, sexier and more successful. See? As mentioned before, I've always told my mum that me spending on cosmetics, hair-styling, nice clothes are a form of investment, and she never believes me!!

Love,
Clare.

posted @ 9:20 AM

Thursday, January 11, 2007

REALLY cannot bear to-- but maybe it’s time to move on.. because I do not want him to end up hating me...

Right.. another entry. It is not what u think-- I am NOT trying my best to become a celebrity blogger (even though I said so, I thought u would have realised that it’s a joke.. -.-) Anyway, if u see me entering a blog entry everyday, it is most probably because I am going thru a 'rough patch' in life.. I am such an emotional freak, I need to pour out my feelings. Keep them in, and I risk bursting, and destroying myself. And I guess I am a sucker for sympathy too lah..

So, I have decided to give up. I have to admit, I can get a bit "freaky" because more often than not, I do not control my emotions, I allow them to control me. I am a classic 'lead by the heart, not by the brain' type of girl. These few days had not been good for me, and I think it is so for him too. I must be driving him nuts with what I said and do some times, but I guess I was kinda screwed up by the emotion roller-coaster he was bringing me on-- anticipation then disappointment, then anticipation, then disappointment.. here and there and here and there, my emotions were pushed around constantly by what he said-- and it was driving me nuts..! Swollen eyes and a tremendous desire to call in sick for work had became a common thing in the morning.. it’s affecting me a bit TOO much, I think..

Maybe you are wondering, or even he, himself, is wondering why his rejection is causing me sooo much hurt.. but truth is-- it is not exclusive to him.. every time a guy I loved leaves me or is unable to like me back, I foolishly allow my own emotions to get out of control, and overwhelmed me. And it gets worse with the years, because the past bad experiences will re-surface the moment such things happen again, and it caused me not to be troubled about just one guy, but my whole life of bad experiences with guys.. All in all, I am just an emotional freak lah.. >0<

He claims that not to be with me is for my own good, I’m not going to be happy with him, so question now is: do I appear very happy to you NOW??? Afraid of moving along because he is afraid of the consequences, but this, ironically, caused me the pain that he is supposedly trying to protect me from.. SO, what is the purpose? I don’t see one at all.. I think eventually, it is not for my own good, he just didn’t want to reject me out-right.. I guess he was trying to be kind..

I really could have lived with just having a simple crush on him, why do things had to happen?? Few minutes of bliss in exchange for days of sadness-- totally not worth it.. I rather just have our simple friendship back.. When things progress, but not to the desired stage-- what is the purpose of the progress then? In this case-- only to add on to my misery.. :(

Anyway, as mentioned before, as much as I want to see him and talk to him everyday, I have to stop interaction with him for now.. because I’m driving myself and him crazy with my emotional actions/words.. It’s better off this way, I guess.. for him, definitely.. for me, it’s a REALLY 'cannot bear to, but have to' situation.. because if this senseless act of mine continues, I will risk losing him for good. I see ABSOLUTELY no future in us actually (since he is soooo unwilling), but at least the friendship is worth keeping, or so I think..

So, I told him, last night, what I think he must be dying to hear from me-- "I think it will be better for us to stop interaction for now". I thought I was really brave when I managed to express it, but the very next second my tears just flow out, can feel the pain soooo much.. not brave at all, in the end, just a fool lah..

Thanks friends and sister for support.. I know I’m always doing such foolish things to myself and always crying to u all.. but what to do?? This is me and I don’t have the will to change.. And it’s terrible to be alone.. I absolutely hate to be alone, so thank you for being there, somehow..

If u had read my previous entry, u would know that I've found an old friend recently, and last night, when I was chatting with him, I told him about this incident, then he said something like: 10 years ago, when he first met me, I had such guys-problem, and now 10 years later, I am still having guys-problem.. See?! I truly believe in karma and past life thingy—so, I seriously think I have very bad karma now due to evil past-lives (haha!) IF that is really the case, then someone pleassseee give me a sign as to how to redeem myself. Another round of heart-break and misery-- can die.. >o<

That day, my sister was showing me pictures of her friend who cut herself on her wrist repeatedly, after suffering from an episode of heart-break. And I thought it is really a great relief that I do not have such tendency and courage to cut myself. But, I think I can understand her reason for hurting herself physically. When the pain inside gets too unbearable, and there is nothing u can do to remove it, u resort to something which u can do, that is to incur a greater pain than that one inside-- and thus help numb it abit, perhaps.. Never tried before, so not too sure...

*Sigh*.. feeling terribly tired from all these silly drama I've inject into my own life. Really don't want anymore liao..

Wu Yue Tian (Mi Lao Shu):

When I woke up, the world is still cruel..
I thought I am used to loneliness..
But I’m now helpless, on the verge of breaking down..
Who will lend me his(/her) embrace to softly cry in?

My dear Ashin (^^v) with his brand new sets of songs, as usual, with wonderful lyrics-- there's a song for every mood, in this new album.. Well.. this song suits me just nice now, I think..

So sad, so tired,
Clare.

posted @ 3:20 PM

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

U are making me feel so tired… My poor heart cannot take this constant fluctuation of emotions any longer, U know?? :(

Wow.. I am writing an entry almost everyday now! I can sooo see myself as a celebrity blogger in future.. haha! Well.. I thought the benefits of being one are quite good—own TV show, free nose job, endorsement deals and such. What do u reckon? With my new-found diligence, all I need now is to be a wee bit more bitchy and interesting.. haha!

That day, I was just grumbling to my friend about recent unfortunate events, hoping to get some sympathy. But all I got was something along the line of “it is all your fault..” :( She mentioned that most part of the misery I am in now is because I cannot get rid of my habit of falling in love soooo easily. U are right, Girl! I could not agree more.

But, sad thing is—such things, how to change?? Other bad habits such as biting nails, touching hair, digging nose in public-- u can get someone to hit u every time u does it (I managed to get rid of one bad habit thru this method. Was sooo proud of myself, and very beaten up, after that.. HAH!) But, falling in love easily—how??! Get someone to slap me every time I fall in love?! Aiyo! By the time I fall out of love, and ready to fall in love with another, I would have forgotten the impact of the pain (frm both the heart-ache and the slap lah.. >.<) Understand what I am getting to here? I am getting a bit confused myself.. >.<
Huh? Whatever lah..! Things that cannot be amended/helped, just forget about it-- no use going on and on..

Ok, so I didn’t managed to get much sympathy from the friend, but she told me something very interesting that happened though. Few weeks back, she went back to Sydney for the uni graduation (lucky gal! She is rich lah, can afford.. I had mine in Singapore only.. >.<) and she went to this weekend flea market that we used to go quite often when we were in Sydney.. They have very beautiful accessories selling there.
Then, they were at this store, which apparently, I had patronized a lot then (I only have a vague idea of which store she was referring to though), and the store-owner kept looking at them. And then! According to my friend, he actually asked about me!

After she told me that, I was like “huh? Are u sure?” I mean, I visited the flea market for maybe only 5 times?? And that store, maybe only 2 times?? (bcos quite ex) All I could remember was that BIG banner over his store and that he’s a rather young-looking Chinese guy, and to think he actually remembers me??!! OK, so I was figuring—it is either he is totally smitten by my extreme beauty (he-he-he xD) & could not forget me OR he had gotten the wrong person. What do u reckon, mate? ^^ I seriously think it is the former. HAHA! xD

Want to share with u all about very interesting article I read in the newspapers that day, about how almost every female in the world suffers from a “condition” known as the Princess Syndrome (cannot remember the exact term used by the writer, but it is something along that line). According to the writer, it is a “condition” whereby girls, no matter who, in what occupation, with what social status etc (only exception given were the feminists) will inevitably yearn for a prince charming to appear in her life. She thinks that there is a princess hiding in every girl—hoping for her prince charming to arrive on a white horse and to sweep her off her feet, and…… a liking for everything pink and lacy.. haha! After reading that article, I was like “Ah Ha! I knew I was not the only one!”, but I think I must be suffering from a severe form of this syndrome—yearning too hard, and likes laces too much (had spent substantial amount of money on buying laces to add on to my tops, bottoms, bags.. ^^)

*Sigh*.. sad thing is I thought I have found my prince charming, but turns out this ‘prince’ is not very willing to come sweep me off my feet on his white horse. He wanted to take things slow, so all he wants to ride on is a donkey, not a horse….. Get the joke? Get the joke? He-he-he.. ^^v

Something really nice happened to me recently (finally..!). A few days back, I was bored at home (as usual), so I was on Friendster—changing some photos, looking thru some friends' profiles, etc.. Then, suddenly I was reminded of a very dear old friend whom I had lost contact with a few years back, and I thought “Hmm.. maybe he is on Friendster too” So, I did a search on his name. Well, it is heng in that he has a rather unique name lah, and the search only came up with 2 results (and not like a million for john or joe or dick etc.. u get the idea..) So, Voila! I found him. Sent him a message, and Voila! The next day I got a reply from him! That fellow—always amazing, could not help but LOL after reading his message.

Really am glad to find him and it is delightful to think about our friendship in the past and how we got to know each other in a, I would say, rather unexpected way too. Would not say that he is the best pal a person can have—insincere most of the time, always suan-ing me about my looks, how no guys want me etc.. (irritatinnnggg..) and teaching me all the bad stuff like smoking, drinking, gambling etc.. haha! I am just exaggerating lah.. ^^

I am reallyyyy a not very interesting person! Bcos I cannot think of anything else to write liao. Work wise—nothing out of the ordinary, love wise—enough said already >.<, family wise—everyone is good ^^..

Oh! Oh! wait! One more nice thing coming up for me ^^.. My annual leave! He-he-he.. Going to Japan for 2 whole weeks! Imagine that, man! It is gonna be an adventure—just me and “dear” vivien.. Shopping, eating, going “Kawaii! Kawaii!” at everything we see and getting crazy in the BAPE stores!! Muahaha.. ^^v Really cannot wait, just about 2 mths more to go.. I think.. ^^

Going to take a nap now, I am seriously not getting enough sleep nowadays, been doing too much online window-shopping.. (it is fun, give it a try someday! ^^) and spending too much time thinking about him.. *sigh*

Thanks for reading. Love ya all ^^v

Clare.

posted @ 4:00 PM

Monday, January 08, 2007

I've gotten some feedbacks regarding my previous entry. Hmm.. and so, i realised-- Ohhh.. so many other people read my blog, not just my two "dear" sisters.. HaHa!

and it's with this in mind, that i'm writing this...

I've never realised that guys can be such ma-fan creatures-- give them, they not happy, don't give them, they also not happy. Then how? What am i supposed to do??!! headache.. >.<

I mean, it's like i'm FORCING him to accept me, and it's SOOO difficult for him. Am i really that ugly, and horrible and terrifying?? (at this point, u are NOT supposed to shout 'Yes!'.. >.<) or maybe because i'm just too 'easy'?? Hmm.. makes one wonder..

Now, without even realising why, i'm starting to get a bit angry. It's not like i'm ugly or what, right?? (i'm not the one saying this.. it's the people ard me keeps saying i'm pretty.. no choice! haha!) and it's not like i have only this one and only choice (even have a Japanese!! "road-sweeper"-- just a name, not his occupation.. confused?? haha!) It's just that i prefer this one mah! And he's making life so hard for me now.. >.<

I swear it's really starting to show-- the mean-ness of a guy after he "gets" a girl. Less caring, less careful with words used, less attentive. *sigh* Perhaps, without a guy in my life is not a curse after all, but more like the Mighty Being up there is trying to protect me from the mean-ness of the human species named 'Male'.. booohooo.. (ToT)

oei! are YOU reading this? YOU are hurting me.. YOU realised that??! :( In thinking that YOU are protecting me, doing me a favour.. YOU forgot to take into consideration my feelings, and what i really want..

I think i've said enough-- the more i said, the more difficult it'll be to face him in future. As much as i claimed to be angry, upset, i still want to see him. I'm such a stupid girl, ain't i??! Oh yes, i am..! and i'm making my own life a misery.. :(

Ok lah.. enough of me, him, this and that.. And since i'm here.. might as well post some photos:

Happy 2007 to all.. May it be a very good year for both u and me..

My new toy no. 1 (i named it ipod NANA ^^).. Bought it bcos i was veryyyyy upset (and bcos my old player died on me lah >.<).. the GAP sweater-- new too. Bought it bcos it's cheap and it's "cold" in Singapore.. :D

Dear sister with our new toy no.2-- PSP.. Just realised that PSP games are freaking expensive!! >.<

Clari's battle-zone!! In the process of clearing my wardrobe.. To make room for new clothes.. HaHa! and who says i have too much clothings??! ok what.. don't understand.. *shake head*

Special for the day: A photo of pretty moi.. ^^v , but with a sad heart.. (with note to self: need to improve on photo-shop skills.. >.<)

U know what just happened??!! This big, freaky-looking, black, long bug appeared out of nowhere and onto my bed, next to my lappy.. Gave me a SHOCK! I didn't know what to do, so i screamed for help -- "Mummy, have insect on my bed!! Jiu-min ahhhhhhh!!!" So, my brave mum rushed in, took a look at the bug, and crushed it with a tissue-paper.. My heroooo... ^^v

Then, my mummy scolded me and say, " see lah! ask u to clear your room, u don't want.. have insects liao lah!" (note: there is this BIG pile of notes i took back from Sydney, lying next to my bed)

Then, i said, " nothing to do with that pile lah..!"

Then, mummy said, " that bug is those found-in-old-books type of worms, u know??!"

And i said, " no lah.. don't bluff.. where got so big one??!!" >.<

To this, mummy said, " who says don't have?? this one brought back from australia one.. of course big lah!!"

1 word-- Lame.. the things my dear mummy will say to get me to clear my room.. Funny! Such a humorous mum, where to find?? HaHa!

Ok, That's all for today. Time for me to go grab something to eat (hungrryyy >.<), then to go shopping! Or maybe just stay home and do some drawing. I'm thinking of getting a new tattoo, hopefully can get it done by this week, because i'm super free on Thursday. And i have a design in mind already, just need to draw it out now..

Thanks for reading. Love u all.. ^^v

Clare.

posted @ 1:45 PM

Wednesday, December 27, 2006

The burn-scar on my hand is constantly reminding me... of something i wish to forget...

Now, u know something unfortunate must have happened for me to be writing an entry, out of the blue. I'm not sure why too, but i'm always in the mood to blog when i'm upset, perhaps i'm just interested in spreading the sorrow, and not the joy..! muahahaha-- such evilness i display.. xD

Right, this time around.. It happened really unexpectedly, and it shouldn't happen, actually. If only, i had not responded to an sms, and heeded my mum's advice. If only, i had listened to her, saying "too late liao, don't go lah", "there jam, don't go lah." I'm always so stubborn, and now, i've learnt my lesson-- 'to always listen to your mummy', the hard way >.<

I have below, some other lessons i have learnt from this unfortunate experience. Perhaps the follwoing pointers may not apply to all of you, since i lead a PATHETIC life, but i truly believe that there are other unlucky (in love) gals swimming in the world out there (hang in there, mates! be strong! u are not alone!) Anyway, just use as references lah.. ^^

(1) Just because u kissed the guy u have had a crush on (for like, forever) doesn't mean that u have finally succeeded in your quest. May means diamonds (= a lot) to u, but means nuts (= nothing) to the guy.. >.<

(2) Do NOT do silly things, which u usually will not do with a sound mind, when alcohol is swimming in your arteries and veins, when u are overwhelmed with jealousy (for eg. after seeing him holding/hugging other girls), when u two are alone with nothing to say.. The singapore police asked drivers not to drive and drive for a reason, u know? >.<

(3) A silly move between the 2 of u could ruin a perfectly good friendship u guys have, maybe not on his part, because, likely thing is that he will not have any hard feelings after that. But on your part, u will be shattered everytime u see him after that. U will never, ever see him in the same light as before, ever again. >.<

(4) When a guy kisses u back, it does NOT necessarily means that he likes u too. It may be JUST another kiss (with a gal) to him. >.<

(5) Don't read too much into a guy's words. Some guys could be such talkers. >.<

AAaahhh...! Just remembered that i'm supposed to be studying for my test tomorrow in Japanese class. Oh yes! ^^ i've finally started on my japanese lessons, now, i'm one tiny, tiny step closer to starting my life anew in a wonderful country-- Japan! ^^v

ok. I have to end here. I'm terribly upset, but i still need to muster up enough mental strength to move on with life. The world doesn't stop revolving just because i feel like dying-- this i know.

But, one last question-- when a guy says that he's not ready for a relationship now, does he:

option A: really means it?
option B: just trying to reject u in a kind way (sort of like: "it's not your fault, it's all mine")?

all u kind souls out there, let me know the answer please. Because to say the truth, my chest hurts so much now, i feel like tearing my hear out-- being drama-mama once again.. i know.. haha! but the hurt i'm feeling now is true.......
i bet those who have been reading my blog entries will definitely wonder why i'm so unlucky. How many times have i been rejected by a guy using the same, old excuse? ha ha ha ha.. i must have been cursed.. *sigh* =(

aiyo.. entry is too long and draggy.. and too sad. So, for a light-hearted end to this entry-- a photo to show my love for japanese food.. ^^v

what the f**k?! even my blog account is cursed! Tried uploading photos many times, but unsuccessful. Oh well.. too bad. Some other day then.

Thanks for reading, once again. May u have a great 2007 to come!! ^^ Hope mine will be good too *fingers crossed*

Truly, Clare.

(just to add on) Lastly, a nice song from Nelly Furtado and that coldplay guy...

'Why do all good things come to an end?'

Honestly what will become of me..
Don't like reality, It's way too clear to me..
But really life is dandy..
We are what we don't see..
Missed everything daydreaming..

Flames to dust, Lovers to friends..
Why do all good things come to an end?..

Traveling I only stop at exits..
Wondering if I'll stay..
Young and restless..
Living this way, I stress less..
I want to pull away when the dream dies..
The pain sets in and I don't cry..
I only feel gravity and I wonder why..

Nice song.. Lyrics-- well said.. Now, I feel like crying again.. =(

posted @ 12:32 AM

Thursday, September 21, 2006

(Note: this entry meant to be posted on the 20th, but something wrong with uploading of photos, so was delayed.. >.<)

Ok.. this is a miracle.. I'm writing another entry after just one new entry yesterday.. Yeah!! (^^)v

actually, the purpose of this entry is bcos my baka sister was reading my blog in front of me (so irritating, right??! >.<) and complaining that i didn't mention her name.. so here goes.......

vivien vivien vivien vivien vivien vivien vivien vivien vivien vivien vivien vivien..

Intro-- My younger sister:

Name-- Akiko-chan.. (^^)v
Idol-- Jolin Tsui (heehee.. she totally adores her, but refuses to admit..). Think she can sing ALL of her songs!! ^^ and i think she likes 183 club too!! (>.<)
Fav guy-- "Monkey-faced"
Hobbies-- Eating maggie mee in the middle of the night, and asking me to drink the soup for her... duh.. -.-''' and making me sing this F.I.R song, and then laughing her head off at my singing.. see??! with a sister like this, how am i supposed to cultivate enough self-confidence to join Singapore Idol??!! (Ref: previous entry) >.<
My fav thing abt her-- Her tummy!! which i love to rub and "fa cai! fa cai!"... (^^)v
My least fav thing about her-- Her unwillingness to listen to me complain about my lack of boyfriends.. (T_T) Nobody understand my feelingsss...!!!

This is Akiko-chan...

Yoshiko-chan & Akiko-chan...

Yoshiko-chan and Akiko-chan's mother, Mummy-chan, driving... very seriously...

Love,

Yoshiko-chan ^^v

posted @ 10:50 PM

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

It's a monday today, and i had told myself on sunday night that if i don't get called back for work, i'll clear up my (terribly messy) room. In the end, i didn't get called back, and i didn't clear my room. So disappointed in myself..

So, i was slacking my day away as usual, when my sister alert me to this entry by this particular famous blogger, regarding some miracle blackheads remover (and i have tons on my nose). & i went to take a look.
Frankly speaking, although i've always hope that others will read my blog, but i don't like reading others' blog. The only blog i read on a regular basis is Edison Chen's. Yup! that Edison Chen! Initially, i was living in the illusion that i'm the only one reading his personal blog, but that was before i found out that there was actually a report on it in a HK magazine.. spoiler!! (>.<)

Ok.. back to the famous local blogger.. Ok, so, i read that entry about the miracle blackhead remover, and i was bored, so i went on reading a few of her previous entries, and found out that after she got famous, she actually gets invited to a launch where there are lots of celebrities!! -- not bad for just a blogger huh? And she got herself a cute little boyfriend too.. ok, maybe the boyfriend had nothing to do with her being famous..

THEN, an idea strike me. Hmmm.... so, maybe if i become famous, then, i can be like her too? Get to go for photo-shoots for newspapers and magazines, get to go for launches with all the other celebrities, get to attract cute guys, get free gifts etc... Wow! i've got to get myself famous!!If not for the other privileges, at the very least, it will help me to get a boyfriend soon!! ^^v

Ok.. So, i started thinking and came up with some ideas to become famoussss ^^v :

Idea no.1-- Become the world's fastest pediatric radiographer. Able to complete a full skull x-ray series for a crying nonstop, stuggling nonstop, refuse-to let-go-of-parent baby in 0.5minute flat.
Once i master this incredible skill, i bet i'll be well-known in the international radiography scene, and all the pediatric hospital will want me working for them.. including those in Japan too, of course.. muahaha!

Idea no.2-- Be featured on the front cover of a popular magazine, for eg) CLEO, Seventeen, LIME, Her World etc.. Actually, i've tried this once, by sending in some photos to Seventeen.. But then, i was still not introduced to the wonders of Abobe Photoshop, so the size of my photos were ENORMOUS, and i think i must have flooded their email inbox, and thus black-listed. But that was almost 1.5 or 2 years ago, so i'm hoping they had forgotten about the email then.. heehee!

Idea no. 3-- Join Singapore Idol. Not a matter of just joining-- but to at least remain till top 3, then can be remembered for at least one year by the public.. haha!

Idea no. 4-- Be a great blogger, with entries soooo interesting and photos soooo beautiful that the whole singapore population is dying to read my new entry everyday.

That's all i can think of for now..

Then, i gave some more thought to the above ideas and this is what i REALLY think of them:

Idea no. 1-- IMPOSSIBLE! Any radiographer who had handled pediatric patients (no matter crying or not) before will know-- Simply impossible.. 3 words to sum up this idea: In My Dreams! X OUT! X

Idea no.2-- I'm not exactly photo-genic, and i suck at Photoshop. So, unless i go knock on the doors of the magazine offices and beg (or bribe) them to feature me on the front-cover of their next issue, this idea is almost not feasible too.. X semi-OUT X

Idea no. 3-- I can't sing for nuts. My singing is soooo bad, even i cannot bear to hear it. (>.<) Actually, one of my collegue suggested this to me before. She said that since i'm so pretty (i'm NOT trying to boast here, but that's really what she said!!), then i should go join Singapore Idol. And i was like, "no way, u are saying this only because you have never heard me sing".. (>.<) Although the standards of the singapore idol finalists are not any better too, but i think i should spare the ears of u guys. U all had suffered enough already, in this season of SI.. oops! haha!
X OUT! X

Idea no. 4-- I'm too lazy to write a blog entry every single day. I mean, look at this blog of mine-- only 22 entries in one year!! and i suck at Photoshop.. And i'm not that bitchy/interesting enough --Enough said... X OUT! X

Damned..! So, it's 3 totally non-feasible ideas and one half feasible one.. *Sigh*, i guess it's really not that easy to become famous. I guess for now, i should just concentrate my time on my (sucky >.<) work, Japanese-language classes and (possibly) motor-bike riding lessons.. ^^v

Yes, u read right!! Motor-bike riding lessons! I've yet to get the green-light from my mummy, but i've been having this thought for ages. Back when i was, i think, maybe 17 or 18 years old, i had already mentioned to my mummy that i wanna learn to ride a motor-bike. But she rejected on that basis that i'm too young and it's too dangerous. So, i gave up. Then, recently, i went out with this guy, and for the first time in my life, i experienced how it felt like to be riding on a real motorbike, and i tell u!! it's simply incredible! Although the date didn't turn out to be great, but the rides on the motor-bike make it worth my time.. ^^

(just to side-track a little here) speaking of which, that guy didn't even call or message me again after that day.. I mean, even if you are not interested in me, u should at least have the courtesy of telling me or hinting me and not just leave things hanging there.. spare a thought for the girl-- it sucks when kept waiting, and waiting and waiting.. just let me know, so that i can move on what!! %#*&#% i think guys should learn to be more considerate and be more daring to voice out your thoughts and not try to hide and escape when faced with such situations-- understand??!! %^#*-&;%

Ok.. That's all for today. After been reminded of that date (and that guy), i'm too sad to carry on writing. (T_T) Anyway, it's also already 2.30am in the morning, and i still need to work tomorrow. Gonna grab some beauty sleep. Thanks for reading and if u know of a fantastic way of becoming famous, please kindly share with me-- help appreciated. Thank you...

Love,
Yoshiko-chan (aka sister of Akiko-chan) ^^v

posted @ 2:35 AM