Clarissa.
22.
23/06/1983.
University Of Sydney.
Sydney, Australia.
hi...
thanks for reading my blog...
do come back again soon..!
The burn-scar on my hand is constantly reminding me... of something i wish to forget...
Now, u know something unfortunate must have happened for me to be writing an entry, out of the blue. I'm not sure why too, but i'm always in the mood to blog when i'm upset, perhaps i'm just interested in spreading the sorrow, and not the joy..! muahahaha-- such evilness i display.. xD
Right, this time around.. It happened really unexpectedly, and it shouldn't happen, actually. If only, i had not responded to an sms, and heeded my mum's advice. If only, i had listened to her, saying "too late liao, don't go lah", "there jam, don't go lah." I'm always so stubborn, and now, i've learnt my lesson-- 'to always listen to your mummy', the hard way >.<
I have below, some other lessons i have learnt from this unfortunate experience. Perhaps the follwoing pointers may not apply to all of you, since i lead a PATHETIC life, but i truly believe that there are other unlucky (in love) gals swimming in the world out there (hang in there, mates! be strong! u are not alone!) Anyway, just use as references lah.. ^^
(1) Just because u kissed the guy u have had a crush on (for like, forever) doesn't mean that u have finally succeeded in your quest. May means diamonds (= a lot) to u, but means nuts (= nothing) to the guy.. >.<
(2) Do NOT do silly things, which u usually will not do with a sound mind, when alcohol is swimming in your arteries and veins, when u are overwhelmed with jealousy (for eg. after seeing him holding/hugging other girls), when u two are alone with nothing to say.. The singapore police asked drivers not to drive and drive for a reason, u know? >.<
(3) A silly move between the 2 of u could ruin a perfectly good friendship u guys have, maybe not on his part, because, likely thing is that he will not have any hard feelings after that. But on your part, u will be shattered everytime u see him after that. U will never, ever see him in the same light as before, ever again. >.<
(4) When a guy kisses u back, it does NOT necessarily means that he likes u too. It may be JUST another kiss (with a gal) to him. >.<
(5) Don't read too much into a guy's words. Some guys could be such talkers. >.<
AAaahhh...! Just remembered that i'm supposed to be studying for my test tomorrow in Japanese class. Oh yes! ^^ i've finally started on my japanese lessons, now, i'm one tiny, tiny step closer to starting my life anew in a wonderful country-- Japan! ^^v
ok. I have to end here. I'm terribly upset, but i still need to muster up enough mental strength to move on with life. The world doesn't stop revolving just because i feel like dying-- this i know.
But, one last question-- when a guy says that he's not ready for a relationship now, does he:
option A: really means it?
option B: just trying to reject u in a kind way (sort of like: "it's not your fault, it's all mine")?
all u kind souls out there, let me know the answer please. Because to say the truth, my chest hurts so much now, i feel like tearing my hear out-- being drama-mama once again.. i know.. haha! but the hurt i'm feeling now is true.......
i bet those who have been reading my blog entries will definitely wonder why i'm so unlucky. How many times have i been rejected by a guy using the same, old excuse? ha ha ha ha.. i must have been cursed.. *sigh* =(
aiyo.. entry is too long and draggy.. and too sad. So, for a light-hearted end to this entry-- a photo to show my love for japanese food.. ^^v
what the f**k?! even my blog account is cursed! Tried uploading photos many times, but unsuccessful. Oh well.. too bad. Some other day then.
Thanks for reading, once again. May u have a great 2007 to come!! ^^ Hope mine will be good too *fingers crossed*
Truly, Clare.
(just to add on) Lastly, a nice song from Nelly Furtado and that coldplay guy...
'Why do all good things come to an end?'
Honestly what will become of me..Don't like reality, It's way too clear to me..But really life is dandy..We are what we don't see..Missed everything daydreaming..Flames to dust, Lovers to friends..Why do all good things come to an end?..Traveling I only stop at exits..Wondering if I'll stay..Young and restless..Living this way, I stress less..I want to pull away when the dream dies..The pain sets in and I don't cry..I only feel gravity and I wonder why..Nice song.. Lyrics-- well said.. Now, I feel like crying again.. =(
posted @ 12:32 AM